i lied last week.
spotlight turned on me and in quick anxious to escape surprising glare, untruth spilled out of my mouth like vomit too sudden to hold back.
even as i backed away from the scene—-denial still speaking for me, i felt shame start to heat my skin and prick my eyes.
i hid to be alone with my choice. holding shame’s blanket tight around, crying at old self visible.
at first i claimed comfort in unexpected missing of god given exit. no way to get over in time.
several days before i made a choice that kept to self seemed acceptable. but spotlighted turned into obvious wrong. looking back god had whispered right but my fear of needs not met had shouted over.
i crossed into outside lane and increased speed.
and before that…map unused lately. finding my own way.
shame i am free to set down. forgiveness mine to accept.
but truth requires revisiting. choice promised is choice given.
no temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. god is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
1 corinthians 10.13 (ESV)