to be certain i am putting all of me into brief time alone with M, i give up what pulls at me most with it’s endless strength.
leaving behind what feels to be biggest need because of declared they-might-need-me.
because sometimes my need for him has to be bigger.
so i set aside connection for the sake of connecting.
so i give up the possibility of being there for the real of in his presence.
so i let go of sharing to take in all he has to share.
and phone that is sometimes too much i stays on counter while we drive away toward us.
“even now,” declares the lord,
“return to me with all your heart,
with fasting and weeping and mourning.”
joel 2:12 (NIV)